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School & The Assault of Physics!

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This email brightened up my night (yes it is like 11.16pm as I post this)!
Dear Kira Knight,
I have had a great time in reading your blog. I glimpsed through it the first time I visited it when I was blogwalking, but I happened to chance upon it again by mere luck and this time, I read through your posts, and I would like to commend you on your fascinating sense of humour and your many kinds on similes and personifications that enliven the whole post. It was truly a joy reading the posts, and I dare not admit that I have had quite a good laugh reading through them. Especially on the rant on public transport. You phrased the whole incident so uniquely and clearly I could actually see it happening in my head! 

I have, since then, bookmarked your blog and am looking forward to your posts everyday. I look forward to reading the posts that you post up daily.

Please, keep up the good work, especially on your unique writing style. I can see a good path ahead for your blog, do keep posting up, and do not keep us readers in suspense! Hope you can post up more frequently! 

Your reader, 
The Maple Optimist - VEGAbond aka VonVega
Hey Maple Optimist! I hope you won't mind me posting this! (: I was so touched and happy that I had to share my joy with the world! Thank you so much for the mail, and all the best to your future endeavours! ;)

See people, cats, dogs, spinach and peanuts! Finally someone has sent me a really sweet mail to tell me that I write well! All this =furrows brow and tries hard to count= 28 days of hard work of writing blog posts which make myself (and you too, just admit it) happy is just worth it! I am so very very over the moon! And the Sun! And over Milky Way and over Boomerang Nebula too! Okie, that was unnecessary, but I cannot just give up a chance to showcase my knowledge that is as vast as the Pacific Ocean right? (btw, is Pacific Ocean getting very polluted? Then does that make my knowledge polluted too? :P)

=takes deep breaths to stop myself from spasming from joy=
Anyway I have some very fun things to tell you all. :D I shall number them again so that my poor brain shall not get all jumbled wumbled. Alliteration rules =sighs with happiness=.
1. Assault of the Psychotic Physics!
Our class got back our physics test paper today, and the teacher looked really grim. Like he just bought this yummy mango and was about to eat it when he realized that it was full of wriggly worms. Okay maybe he looked grimer than that. He looked like he lost his ring on the day of wedding, or lost his wallet when he was out trying to buy condoms. Sick jokes omg. =smacks myself in the head=

In all, his face was as black as the ________ (please put whatever word that you like).

He said our class did terribly and that only 9 folks in our class of 36 scored A1 (highest ranking) and the MSG was over 3.00. Omg. No wonder he looks like he wanted to swallow his socks. Or maybe make us swallow them if he could. 

I did pretty okay, I got A! =puffs up with pride=

But in order not to get bashed by my classmates reading my blog, I shall stop the self-praise here or tomorrow I am going to get pistachios stuffed into my nostrils. I am sorry if I sound a bit cranky here, but I haven't taken a nap and no nap = cranky + nutty.

Some of my closest friends did not do as well as they had wanted and they looked really upset. I felt really bad that I could not feel bad enough for them because I was still feeling relieved that I didn't screw my own test. Yeah I know I sound really terrible, but I try to, really. I tried my best to look gloomy and moppy because they were sad and it wouldn't be nice for me to just stick myself to the ceiling like spiderman shouting "YAHOOOOOOOOO!" right? 
Actually when I heard that my friends did not do well, my heart did sank a little. Just a little. Because they are after all my close buddies and it makes me sad to see them sad. But not sad to the extent that I cannot feel happy for myself lar. I mean, I am not that much of a saint! I know I wear white, but Knight is no saint! Otherwise I would long be in Africa feeding skinny little kids congee. :D

2. Dialogue Session with Principal
 Not sure if it is supposed to be principle or principal. I always mix them up together, and I am too lazy to check. Someone check and tell me kay? (:

[Updates: okay, thanks guys for checking for me. I get it, it is principal, not principle! Teeehee, seems like people are more enthu about checking for spelling than telling me what you think about what you think about this. I had like 5 or 6 kind souls telling me about "it is principal not principle! :D]
Anyway, during this dialogue, we are supposed to raise issues of concerns to the Principle so that she can get solve it for us, I suppose? I am definitely going to complain about the quality of the school food, it is worse than chicken feed. If you have read all my posts (which you obviously should have), you would realize that our new canteen's food has given moi countless stomach pains and diarrhea and ultimately caused the detachment of my pricey placenta and womb.

Anyway, our school's new canteen is horrible because:
  • Food is too expensive! hey! I am a kid after all!
  • Food too little.
  • Fried eggs have eggshell in them :(
  • Rice too hard
  • Noodles (kuay tiao or whatever that broad noodle like thingy is supposed to be) is chao da (aka burnt)
Yes. I have to lodge a complaint. If I don't get enough food or if the food is still priced like diamonds after my complaint, I plan to write to the Ministry of Canteens.

FYI, MOC does not exist.

Imagine my conversation with the principal:
Me:  The food is too expensive and too little! The rice bowl so big, the food so little!
Pri: Ahh is that so? I shall feedback to the canteen!
Me: And I often have tummy pains from eating them!
Pri: =aghast= How can that be? How can you be certain that your tummy pain is due to school food?
Me: Why? I don't travel to MacDonalds for recess you know? And my tummy pains always happen several hours after I eat school food.
Pri: =decided that she shall ignore me= Ahhh I see. Any other concerns?
Me: My placenta fell off!
Pri: =visibly annoyed= what??!?
Me: =proceeds to give one loud wail= my placenta fell offfff...oooohooooboooohoooo....
Pri: =decided that I have lost whatever marbles I had and sent me off to wood bridge hospital=
Oh noes. This is not good. Not good at all. I have to hatch a plan on how to make the my principal do something about the terrible food. Maybe I shall do voodoo. No lar cannot lar, me no like black magic. Maybe I should hypnotize her....?
Me: Thou shalt listen to my commands.
Pri: Thy wish is my command, my princess. ('princess' to be pronounced with a curl at the "rrrrrr")
Me: Abolish the cest abominable food! 
Pri: Thy wish is my command, my gorgeous.
Me: And put a stop to the no fun musical. Thou art killing thy plants!
Pri: Thy wish is my command, my beautiful.
Me: And stop saying "thy wish is my command, my whatever", it is annoying.
Pri: Thy wish is my command, my whatever.
Me spasms to death at the robotic "thy-wish-is-my-command"  bodoh and decided to ban her to Lalalala Land.
3. Pretty Pictures (:
I love to look at pretty sparkly things! So all my pictures are pretty, like me! tahahahaha!
IH Schedule for Term 3.

Pretty right? Rainbowy!

Headphones from Phiephie and JQ for B-dae. Dino years ago, but here regardless(:

B-dae presents. And I do not like to call presents "prezzies". Saturated(:

Soft Dreamy Mode! :D Perfect!

From Taiwan Buddy Zuohui. :') I miss her already!
 Admittedly, I think pictures are annoying when some are landscape some portrait. I'm sorry about that. Shall take all my pics in landscape in the future!

4. Gross Disgusting Goose-bump Raising Dream
Dreamt that Xuannie and I were chatting away at a table. I think it was at Malacca hotel lobby. The disgusting thing was that Xuannie looked like a plant--she apparently had vascular bundles that showed up super clearly under her translucent skin, I mean you can even see the defined xylem and phloem! Gross ttm sia. Anyway, these vascular bundles are supposed to be poking through the skin, and there was a fine amount of crystal like thingum clogging up the vascular bundles. 

I can clearly recall the conversation:
Xuannie: All these crystal thingums are sugar deposits!
Me: Aiyoh! Why so much sugar coming out from you? You plant arh?
Xuannie: I eat a lot of sweets.
Me: Yeah right. I eat more than you and I don't have so much sugary stuff pouring out from my veins. 
Xuannie: Really?
Me: I think you have diabetes lor. Only diabetic people need to excrete all that extra sugar before you turn into a bloody sugar-cane. 

WAHAHAHHA. The conversation quite funny, but whenever I think of Xuannie's frog-like skin, I shudder a lot and have goose-bumps all over me. Pray never let me dream of translucent skins, sugar and vascular bundles again! :'(

5. Shopping/ Surprise for all readers!
I am going out to watch the Amazing Spiderman with Nehceh, JQ, Chinny and Wennie on Sunday! Going to Jurong Point then somewhere else!!

I am going to do something really darn cool! You all have to support me when I publish the cool thing okie? Yes I am leaving you in suspense! Come back on Sunday/Monday night and my awesome earth shattering post will be ready!
6. I want to talk about my mother's irritating friend, but I am too tired to. I assure you it is very very interesting (and will make you yank your fluffy hair out after reading). I will write about it tomorrow, okie? -hugs all my readers-  
Okay, this is super funny. I laughed for a good 5 mins! (: Source: 9gag


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