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Sometimes, just philosophically so

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I sat on the bus, gazed out of the window, and one cliched question just came to my head,

"What do I want to be when I grow up?"
Photo credit: Stephen Walter
This question has been around for as long as I can remember, and stale as the breadcrumbs found under your bed. But when asked, what would I want to be when I grow up, I found that I had no answer.

I had no answer to the question.
At all.

I know when I am asked that at school, or by my mother or any adults for that sake, I have always dutifully told them what everyone felt was the best jobs:

a. Doctor
b. Lawyer

They would gaze on in approval, mixed with awe, wondering how I could have already decided on something to do in the future.

Truth is, I didn't.

School always tell us to listen to people from all walks of life to allow us to know, to understand, and then eventually decide on what we want to be when we grow up. I have heard so much, I learnt to much, but at the end of the day, I had still had no answer to that seemingly simple, yet unanswerable question.

Then, today, on that semi-hot-cold bus that I sat on, gazing out into the blistering heat of the tropical sun, I had an epiphany.

"Knowing more about the different jobs does not really let you know what you want to be. It just allows you to know what you don't want to be, what you don't want to be stuck in your life doing it."
=smiles at my own amazing realization=

I used to think that I wanted to be a MP, a grassroot leader or something in the politics. But being the Secondary 3 level coordinator for Board of Monitors changed my mind totally. I realized that I hated responsibility, because every time BOM scheduled a meeting, I would feel unhappy, hateful and irritated till the meeting is over. I came to realize that it was due to the fact that I would do each job carefully, too carefully, and tire myself out. And nobody likes feeling tired.

I didn't like working with too much people either.
I hate organizing events.
I don't like the BOM teacher in charge too much. =SHHHHH!!!!=

[My junior saw the BOM teacher surfing the net for cheap facials, tahahaha! Also, she always have full makeup on, according the the same junior. :D]

So far I like blogging. It is fun, and extremely rewarding, not to mention how awesome I feel whenever I get sponsored for an advertorial.

But no, blogging is not going to be my main job either.
I like to read fun interesting things, and maybe write some funny things every now and then. But to think that I have to type so much each day makes me cringe in terror.
Blogging can always be a side job, but never the main.

I don't think I want to be a teacher either, or a tuition teacher, because I have little patience with children. I have taught so much tuition since I was Secondary One, and boy! I feel like strangling kids when they don't get what I say at the first time.

Currently, the jobs still in consideration are:
  • Doctor (hmmmm, not exceptionally appealing)
  • Researcher at CERN (not really lar)
  • Lawyer (also don't really want to be)
  • Entrepreneur (easy to say, hard to do)
Not going to think about them too much...I guess? When the time comes, everything will go the way it is meant to be, no pointing killing my brain cells and getting a brain as empty as Miley Cyrus. Tahahahaha~

Okays, enough of the philosophical rant.
Shall go do work now, bye! (:


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