Last Verse of Grief

Last Verse of Grief
[Original Poem on Live & Dictate]

For years now, I have walked
Aimlessly, in the dark, dingy abyss
that you and I called "home".
I stumbled, tripped and fell
There were no hands to hold me up.

I grieved, oh,  how I grieved.

Ever sat by the window and wondered
for hours at an end,
that if things would have been better
if I had not been me?
I had no answers for it. Just guesses.

I grieved, still, I grieved.

Every sunset I spent,
Watching silhouettes of the birds
against the dimming, fiery sky; returning home
As the last inch of sun fell with my heart
I turned and questioned, "Where is my home?"

The grief of mine, it knew no bounds.

The same creaking window, the same dimming sky,
The ever changing birds, the ever ticking time
washed away the last remnants of a childhood
that I rather not remember.
I looked back on me and think, "That's not me."

Oh, but the grief, it escalates as I seem to fall back in time.

But no. I am me no longer,
I have grown up, grown stronger.
No one can hurt me now.
The memories to me feel like I was watching
the painful, horror-filled life of someone else.

I have to reconcile with myself.

So this is the last verse,
The very last verse of grief,
of unspeakable, immense, unimaginable pain
that had almost driven me insane.
But my wounds close, as this last verse falls.

My last verse of grief, dedicated to a once-grieving me.